So this is what it’s like to go home for the first time. The patches of woods amid gentle slopes of farmland seem familiar, but the primary crop grows on vines that can extend more than 20 feet skyward.

If senior citizens wanted to serve as footrests, or stand in corporate lobbies as experimental artwork, I’d be the first one to put my feet up, admire the view and applaud their work. But the reality is far more insidious, and the time to respect our elders has passed.