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Monday, Dec. 28, 2009

Fashion Don’ts

What Not to Ring in the New Year With

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This year rings in 2010 and a new decade. Here are my top three faux pas of the recent year:

 • Problem. Thong underwear sticking out of your denim. Same to you thug wanna-be boys who have their underwear five inches higher than their butt hanging denim barely grasping onto the junk in your trunk. We’ve noticed that some fellows that lack junk have to pull their pants up from falling to their knees every three steps or so. How funny when they try to run!

• Lesson. The whole world really does not want to see your underwear. Really. Nor is this a good way to get a real boyfriend/girlfriend that will respect you.  Shame on you Eminem for your loose hanging pants. No, he is not dead like the new rumor on the Internet.  But his old pant style is! Look at his dual looks.  Ladies, which one do you like better? I like the cleaned up version.

• Solution.  Thank goodness that waists are currently being designed to wear higher. However hard it is for you to adjust, really this will show off the natural curves that a woman has anyway and hide the “top of the muffin.” If you are a long-waist thinner gal, you no longer look gangly and boyish. As for men, you look better and don’t have to keep pulling your pants up.  Women love seeing a well-dressed man. Real men appreciate a put together sexy woman who isn’t showing everything at first meeting.

 • Problem.  Dark lip liner, dark eye liner. You know, like Pamela Anderson keeping it alive in the millennium by wearing red lipstick with a dark almost black liner. Was this intentioned to make our lips look bigger? Frankly, I am not sure but it looked goth, not glam!

2009-12-28

• Lesson. There is no need to look like a cartoon character unless you are intending to, like the new Japanese Street Fashion, which I think is kind of cool to show your creative style.  My point, if you are going to do it, do it completely! And, heavy black eye-liner, only wear it if you are dressing up as Cleopatra on Halloween.

• Solution. Stick to the natural look.  Line your lips with just a shade slightly darker than your lip color. Eyeliner is great, but if you are fair skinned, blonde or a redhead, black generally is too dark. Stick to a brown shade. For everyone, don’t leave the house looking like you took a Sharpie to your face.

• Problem. Harem pants.

2009-12-28

• Lesson. If MC Hammer couldn’t keep it going as a classic in the ‘80s, why bring it back. This is a good example of an ‘80s influence brought back in a very bad way. There have been very good ones such as a soft metallic vs. a shiny gaudy metallic where the trend was softened to bring elegance. The only woman I can think of looking half way decent in these pants would have to have no chest, no hips, a foot long torso and be over six feet tall.

• Solution. Wear pants that work with your body.  Don’t wear a trend just because it is in. Thankfully, what is acceptable in fashion now is wearing whatever length of pant (or skirt) that works with your shape.

Heidi Calaway is owner and head stylist for Boutique Vieux et Nouveau

www.boutiquemilwaukee.com